A mother’s tale of growth after the death of her son…

The below writing is a heartfelt story from a mother who has buried her child; I include her story in its entirety simply because her message is so very important.  Apart from some grammatical errors, nothing has been changed.

 

A Story from Elise and her beloved son Luke who now resides in the realm of spirit.

I wrote the following FB post a few months after two incredible experiences that shifted my grief journey into a much lighter, grateful, and peaceful place.   Last August I did a type of grief therapy called Repair & Reattachment Grief Therapy with Rochelle Wright, she wrote a book about it with Craig Hogan.   (I know, without a doubt. I was lead to her by my Luke, but that is a whole other story); it re-framed all of the terrible memories of my son’s last hours on earth.   The bad memories are completely gone and replaced with amazing new memories of me with my boy.

Then only a month later, I attended the Afterlife Research and Education Symposium (again, a ton of signs lead me there including Rochelle asking to talk about Luke and me in her presentation at the conference).   Both the therapy and the conference were the first time I had travelled anywhere since Luke passed.   I had a ton of anxiety about travelling and leaving my young son and while it had been over 2.5 years and I almost cancelled both trips right before, but I was completely pushed to go by Luke/Spirit.

It turned out to be completely life-changing for me. I think learning all we can about the afterlife and becoming truly grateful for our earth experiences can shift us into a life filled with supernatural miracles instead of just human suffering. May you find comfort if you choose to read further. I am so thankful for my sweet, beautiful boy who was my teacher then and continues to be now. ❤️

 

I have been mulling some things over the past couple months and thought I would write it out hoping it may help someone else. I have had quite an intense shift in my perspective which has made my life and my grief journey so much better. In mid-September, I attended the Afterlife Research and Education Symposium in Scottsdale, Arizona.

 

For the first time, I was surrounded by people (a lot of them…over 500) who believe that our deceased loved ones still exist and are interacting with us with signs and messages of love.   Yes, they have shed their physical bodies, but their Spirits are alive and well on “the other side.” Spiritual signs are not new to me.   I experience so many spiritual communications between myself with my boy Luke in my daily life.

 

I kind of feel like a “weirdo” for thinking this which is quite odd to me because many people and most religions do believe in life after death but seem not to have much to say about the people who have transitioned over. It was very comforting for me to be in a place where I felt like I belonged and where the atmosphere radiated loving energy.

Most of the people at this conference had lost someone incredibly important to them which lead them to seek out learning more about the afterlife, and I met several sweet grieving mothers while there.   One conversation, in particular, did get me thinking because I was a bit surprised at what I said.   I sat down about 10 minutes early before the presentations on Saturday afternoon began.  Another young woman sitting next to me struck up a conversation. She asked me what brought me to the conference and I told her that my oldest son was in Spirit and of course her immediate reaction was sadness and response of “I am so sorry.”

I nodded and said thank you and then shocked myself by saying “Actually I am not sorry and let me explain why.” This writing may come out clumsy, so I apologize in advance but know it is all from my heart.   I will no longer say I am sorry about my beautiful boy Luke anymore and I will not let the moment of his physical death overshadow the amazing 5+ years he had on earth and the beautiful eternity he is experiencing now.

He was, and still is, my biggest blessing and I am not sorry about that at all. His life and “death” catapulted me into intense learning, growth, and transformation and I am not sorry about that. I had learned so much and am still learning and, even more important, yearn to learn which wasn’t even a concept in my life when Luke was still here physically.

The millions of beautiful moments I had with him while he was here on earth and the connection we continue to have completely trumped the moment of his physical death.

Yes, I still feel intense sadness that I do not get to talk with him and hold him and watch him grow up here on earth. I will never deny my longing to have him physically here, but my gratitude that he was mine in the first place and is mine forever makes it all worthwhile.  I have realized that I never fully comprehended what being thankful meant before.

I am so incredibly thankful for my beautiful sweet boy and all that he has taught me and continued to teach me. I am so thankful he chose me to be his Mama, and he gave me the gift of telling me that fact a week before his unexpected passing.   I am so blessed with such a special little boy with a supernatural understanding of Heaven, to the point where I know for a fact he came from Heaven and then went back again.

He was pure love and joy in human form, and his amazing soul still can shine his light down on me which gives me the energy to keep going. Yes, he left his earthly life earlier than what I would have liked, but I know God called him Home because his work here completed and that it is only because of him (in both physical presence and his spirit presence) that I am growing into the person I am now.

I may not yet know what I am here to accomplish, but I do know that it will be revealed in time and that Luke is with me every step of the way.   I still feel his incredible love and am surrounded by it and reminded of it daily. His signs of love reaffirm his existence, and I am so lucky that I know without a doubt that I will be with my boy again one day.

I used to wish for that day to come soon but I no longer do. I used to think that there was absolutely no way I could survive “x” number of years without my Luke but now know after surviving almost three years now and learning all that I have, that I can survive and WILL SURVIVE because my soul knows I still have work to do and lessons to learn.

I am letting my life unfold instead of trying to control everything as I did in the past. I know I will be lead to the places I need to go and to the people I need to meet for my continued healing and the healing of others. I am keeping myself open to whatever crosses my path and know that even when “bad” things happen, blessings can still abound.

I will always try to find the bit of good in what seems bad and to see the potential for growth in everything that occurs. Everyone has their journey and lessons to learn, and I am grateful to be able to share with you all that I have learned so far.

Sending blessings and love out to Facebook land today!

 

 

 

 

 

http://afterlifeinstitute.org/

#LovefromLuke
#ShiningLightParent
#StillRightHere

Photo by Lora Denton Photography ~ Sept. 2017

Helping Parents Heal…

Australia and New Zealand Parents

Helping Parents Heal Inaugural Online Meeting for Parents

Helping Parents Heal is a wonderful organisation designed to allow parents whose children have transitioned to support each other. Unlike many bereavement support organisations, members share knowledge about signs, after death contacts, mediums and other methods of direct communication with their children. HPH meetings are uplifting, inspiring and enlightening.

When: 19th December

Where: Online Zoom – by putting this link into your browser Join from PC, Mac, Linux, iOS or Android: https://zoom.us/j/6123708172

Or email karynjarvie@ozemail.com.au

When:

4.30 Perth
6.00 pm Darwin
6.30 pm Brisbane
7.00 pm Adelaide
7.30 pm Hobart
7.30 pm Melbourne
7.30 pm Sydney
9.30 pm Christchurch
9.30 pm Wellington

Zoom is the leader in modern enterprise video communications, with an easy, reliable cloud platform for video and audio conferencing, chat, and webinars across mobile, desktop, and room systems. Zoom Rooms is the original software-based conference…
ZOOM.US

COMMENTARY: BATTLE FOR THE MIND


 

Victor Zammit is the author of the Friday Report, a weekly report that has been printed every Friday for the past 18 years.  This weeks report can be found at this link.            http://victorzammit.com/November24th2017

 

Over the last five years we have seen the closed minded skeptics getting fewer and fewer, while orthodox religions are also losing numerical support.

Collectively we are going through an expansion of the mind unseen in human history. Fewer people are accepting traditional creation stories and religious beliefs. At the same time they are refusing to accept the materialist explanation that everything in the universe came by chance. 

Fundamentalists and other traditional religious believers blame the reduction in the number of their followers on the evils of materialism. However people are saying that they are not finding traditional religious information convincing and relevant.

This is why objective, repeatable afterlife research is more important than ever. People are opening their minds, seeking a new understanding of who we are, and our place in the universe. People are looking for the TRUTH and the TRUTH about the afterlife sets us free from fear of death and despair about life.

Letter from heaven…

Dear……………,
Now that I am in Heaven, I know that life for you there just isn’t the same.   I want you to know that I hear you say how much you miss me and love me every day.   Yes, I still hear you.    I love you so much too.    My love for you will never waiver from Heaven.   I can’t say that I miss you because you see, missing you is a negative emotion, and we simply don’t have negative emotions here in Heaven.   And so, instead of missing you for all of the years that you have left in your life, I will Love you through them.   I know it is hard to continue when you feel you are walking through life without me, but I want you to know that I am right here next to you.   I walk through your life with you now, guiding you and helping you along the way.     Our relationship never ended when I graduated to Heaven; it is simply different now.      Heaven is all around you.    Heaven is truly only 3 feet off of your floor.

I want you to look for the signs that I leave for you from Heaven. You won’t have to look very hard because I will surround you with signs in so many different ways.   You see, I am limitless when it comes to leaving you signs.   Birds, butterflies, silly shaped rocks, rainbows, clouds that look like me, electronic mishaps, songs on your radio, coins, feathers, oh I wouldn’t begin to be able to tell you how many different kinds of signs that I can bring into your path.   When you see the signs I send, don’t let your conscious mind tell you that it wasn’t from me, because it was.   Sometimes you may miss the signs that I send you because it is hard to see the beauty in the world around you through tears and that is okay; I will just keep with the signs of love until those tears clear.

I am not missing out on your milestones or the milestones within our family.   I love the way you think of me so often.   The ways that you and the family have honoured me since I journeyed home to heaven are pretty amazing.   Please try not to dwell on the day and way that I passed, for my legacy of love that I left behind for you is so much more beautiful than my passing.    It hurts you to think of my passing, and that hurt is not the best part of me that I left for you.    I want you to hold on to our sweet memories that we share with one another.

When you find yourself in a day of tears, please just replace one of those tears with your favourite memory of me.   I will sit with you as you remember me and enjoy the memory with you.   I know you would love to see me in dreams every night as you go to sleep.   I would love to be there in your dreams each night as well.   When you say out loud, “I never see you in my dreams”, it places blocks in my way because your energy says that you don’t see me.   I want to help you with that.   I want you to change that phrase to, “ I look forward to seeing you in my dreams in your perfect timing”.   It will help you to place this positive focus on seeing me in your dreams when the timing is right.   The reason I don’t come every night in your dreams is that you do need space to work through your grief as well.

You see, you are gaining more strength through your grief than you ever knew you could carry in life.   Part of that strength is my gift to you, and that gift will only make sense someday when you return home to Heaven here with me. We spend our lives there living for our spiritual growth.    Some of the most beautiful spirits write from and of the most difficult paths, and I want you to be so proud of yourself for the life you are living with all of the obstacles you placed within your path.   I also want you to know how extremely proud of you I am as I watch you learn and grow from Heaven. You are not being punished when I went to Heaven before you.    I simply reached my soul’s beautiful goal of growth in life.   I achieved this amazing goal before you, and it didn’t mean that I left you for one moment.   I graduated to the next part of my eternal journey.

Oh, you should have seen it when I got here!!   All of our family and friends who graduated  before me were right at my side to greet me when I arrived.   Even the pets that we had along the way were waiting with smiles and wags as I walked into the light!   I went into a review of my life after I arrived and it was incredible to see all of the lives I touched there with mine.   I got to re-live my life through the eyes of every person that my life touched along the way.   It was beautiful to watch my life through your eyes as well.   Don’t worry, when you get here, you will get to review your life through everyone’s eyes as well as your own and even through mine.   There will be moments you are extremely proud of, and there will also be moments that you will recognize that you could have handled differently.   But, the beauty of those moments is that you are living, and in your life, not everything will be perfect, and that is just part of our growth.   None of us can take back the things we could have done differently, but we sure can grow from those moments.   Of course, me telling you this now gives you an opportunity to look at the days in your future differently so that you will be proud of them when you look back.   I didn’t have to make myself a home when I arrived here because I already had one.   You see, I lived in Heaven before I lived there on Earth with you and I simply returned to my beautiful home.   You will remember it too when you get here.

The colours here in Heaven aren’t like anything you have there on Earth!   The light that fills the air lifts our souls with love.   The Angel’s choir has such a Heavenly sound that it brings peaceful showers of love down upon you all on Earth.   The weather here is perfect always.   Time doesn’t exist here which is nice too, I mean we don’t have to run around heaven looking at our watches on our spirit wrists worried about being late for anything,   You see, you can’t place a time on Eternity.

We don’t work here in the way that you all work on Earth, but we do work.  We work on our spiritual growth, and we are always working on the beautiful evolution of our Souls growth and strength.   Just remember as you walk through your life every day, that I am right here at your side.   I cheer you on in your times of Greatness, and I wipe your tears in your moments of pain.   So what if you have a day of tears, I will stay at your side for comfort. I can tell you that I am most proud of you as you get out and live life to its fullest. I don’t want you to think that you can no longer live because I am “Gone” because I am not gone at all.   Carry me with you in all that you do for I am here. The dreams that you wish you could have lived out with me in life are still possible and don’t you worry;  I won’t miss them.

My biggest message of all in this letter to you is that I am perfect, don’t worry about me.  I Love you, and I am with you for always, I want to see you live life to its fullest, I want to see you catch your dreams and I see you and hear you always both when you speak out loud and even when you talk silently to me in your mind.   Someday this will all make perfect sense when you get to be with me so don’t worry that it doesn’t make sense now. Just know that you are a miracle and because you are a miracle, you are capable of creating miracles as well.

I Love You……

All Of My Love,
Me Up In Heaven.

 

heart roseadapted letter

 

from “They Shall be Comforted”

Maurice Barbanell (1902-1981) was an accomplished journalist and superb medium for the Teachings of Silver Birch.  The description of “life after life” in his book “They Shall Be Comforted” is well worth sharing.

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If you are currently grieving the passing of a loved one, you are urged to read this extract.

One day after “death” you will be the same individual as you were one day before it, except that you will have discarded your physical body.    You will express yourself through your etheric body, which is a replica of the physical one.    It does not, however, reproduce any of its imperfections.

All disease and infirmities will be left behind.    The deaf will hear.   The dumb will speak. The blind will see.   The cripple will be a cripple no longer.

You must try and understand that life in the spirit world is not dreamy or nebulous.   It is full of activity.     It is just as real as the life that each one of us lives here.     We are accustomed to thinking of the material world as being real and solid, although actually, this is not so, as the science of physics proves.    The things of the mind, or the spirit, seem to us shadowy and vague, but to those who live on the Other Side, the mental is the real and the physical is the shadow.

This doubtless will be hard for you to grasp, but you will find a perfect analogy if you think of your dreams.     When you dream, all the things that you encounter are real at the time of their happening. They only become dreams when you wake up.    If you never woke up, and dreaming was the perpetual state of your existence, then that state would become your reality.

The spirit world is round and about us.    Some people see it and hear it because they can tune into its vibrations.     It is not situated in some far-off continent.     It is a part of the universe, blending and intermingling with the physical world.

You must dismiss from your mind the old-fashioned theological idea that, after “death,” there is an undisturbed eternal sleep.      There may be, at first, a short time of rest to enable the newly-arrived spirit to adjust himself to his new life.   This usually takes a little time. Then he meets those who have preceded him.   Families are reunited.    Old associations are re-established.    Friendships are renewed.

I know the question you will ask is, “How will I be able to recognise those who have gone before?”   This is not a real difficulty.   They will know you, having watched over you and kept in constant touch with you.   Then, because the spirit world is a place where thought is the reality, they will be able to show themselves to you as you knew them.

There is, however, one great factor always operating in the spirit world – the unalterable law of attraction.   Only those of like spiritual qualities can meet on the same plane in the new life. The husband and wife, who were only held together on earth by a legal tie, and between whom no real love existed, will not be together in spirit life.

Sometimes, people are puzzled because they learn that there are houses on the Other Side.    You must remember, though, these are not houses made of bricks and mortar but constructed out of thought.    This applies also to the clothing that is worn.

The instinct to clothe oneself is deeply rooted and has become habitual. No one would dream of walking through the streets unclothed.    This habit is part of our mental make-up.    That is why it persists on the Other Side where mental states are the reality.

“What about food?” you may ask. “Do they eat?”

As long as there is a desire for food, this mental desire is mentally satisfied.    As long as the individual craves for food and drink, he can obtain the illusion of what he requires – and it satisfies him.   You may call this material if you like, but it is far more sane and logical than pearly gates and golden harps!

In the spirit world, there are no language difficulties.   All people of all nations speak the same language – thought.    There are no words to be mouthed, for ideas are conveyed telepathically, from one person to another.     Words, after all, are but clumsy substitutions for thoughts.    They are artificial means by which we communicate our ideas to one another.   But words can never adequately express the thoughts one is trying to convey.

One day, when the human race has evolved,  language will be abolished.   We will have learnt how to send our ideas to each other telepathically.    Then, many of our international difficulties will disappear.

In the spirit world, each person’s thoughts are known and cannot be hidden.   There can be no deception of pretence.   Every individual is known for what he is.   He cannot deceive anybody, for lying is impossible.

“What about age?” you may ask. “What happens to old people who pass on?”

Physical age and mental growth do not proceed at the same rate.   We rashly judge a man’s mentality by the age of his physical body here.   On the Other Side of life, it is the mind which survives, and mental growth consists of progress towards maturity.   Little children will grow older.   The old people grow younger in spirit.

What work do they do?   Each person seeks to express his natural bent.   In this earthly life of ours, there are thousands of singers who have never sung; actors who have never acted; painters who have never painted; poets who have never written a line of poetry; musicians who have never composed a note of music.   All these talents have never had an opportunity of being expressed, because through economic circumstances usually, the owners had to follow some other occupation to secure their bread and butter.

On the Other Side, they can express their talents.   There are no square pegs in round holes in that world.   For them, life is one continuous road of progress, each person striving to eliminate the dross from his nature and perfecting his own being. In that striving for perfection, there is no limit.   It goes on for eternity.

The spirit world will not be so unfamiliar as we think because … most of us visit it in our sleep state.   Unfortunately, few of us remember what transpires.   When, however, we pass on, the law of association of ideas will recall our nocturnal experiences.

Of course, it takes some time for the newly arrived spirit to acclimatise himself to the conditions of life on the Other Side.   This process of awakening differs according to the knowledge of spirit life that the “dead” man had before his passing.   The more ignorant he was, the longer it will take him to familiarise himself with his new conditions.

Then, too, those who were trained in very orthodox ideas, with rigid conceptions of after-“death” states, experience a great difficulty, because the next stage of life being a mental one, they live in the mental world they have created, until they have evolved sufficiently to dispel this illusion.

When we pass on, we do not enter Heaven through “pearly gates”, neither do we descend to Hell through lakes of “fire and brimstone”.    Nor do we sleep forever.

Each one of us naturally gravitates to the spiritual sphere for which we are fitted, according to the life we have lived and the character we have evolved here.   We cannot occupy a higher sphere than the spiritual status we have reached, nor will we desire to occupy a lower one.    Automatically, we shall go just to that plane of spirit life for which we are fitted.   We shall not be able to pretend that we are better or worse, for stripped of our physical body we shall be revealed and known for what we are.

People who have lived normal lives will not find anything to disappoint them when they arrive in the spirit world.   It is the selfish man who has to face great difficulties, due to these earthly habits which act as a barrier to be overcome by progress before he is fitted to associate with those he loves.   If by virtue of life he has lived upon earth, he has cut himself off from those who love him, that will be his hell.

What is heaven?   It is the reward of a life wisely spent on earth, for it will mean that automatically we reach those we love … heaven and hell are mental states.   Of course, those who dwell on a higher plane can, if they so desire, visit spirits on relatively lower spheres.   This they often do.   But it is impossible for those on lower planes to visit those on higher.

In many cases, those who “die” go through a difficult period of stress, due to the fact they cannot reach the ones they love on earth.   When they have awakened to an understanding of their new life, they naturally return to their loved ones to try to tell them of their survival.    They find it hard to understand that while they can see the earthly members of their families, the bereaved are unable to sense the presence of those for whom they are mourning.

This is a very poignant sorrow that thousands of spirits experience. They do all they can to attract the attention of earthly friends, but too often they fail and have to leave them disconsolate.

By some law which we do not understand, those on the Other Side know a little beforehand when somebody is going to pass from this world.   They make the necessary preparations to greet them and to help them with their passing.    This explains the fact that on hundreds of occasions people before they “die” have named “dead” relatives they said they could see in the room.   Sometimes these spirit relatives have been seen by those in attendance on the “dying” person.

Clairvoyants who have witnessed the “death” of an individual tell us that they see a replica of the physical body gradually rise, connected for a while by a thread (it is what the Bible describes as the “silver cord”) which is attached to a vicinity near the brain. When the thread is snapped, “death” takes place.   This etheric body is then seen to rise upwards until it disappears from view.

The one thing that brings the greatest sorrow to those who have passed on is our excessive grief.   This, curiously enough, acts as a deterrent to their getting close to us. They do not like the constant visits to the graveyard as they know they are not there. Most Spiritualists make a habit of placing flowers near the photograph of the one who has passed on, particularly remembering anniversaries.   This serves to perpetuate the idea that the spirit is constantly in the home.

Spiritualist also indulge in the habit of mentally communicating with those who have passed on by sending them messages, treating them as if they were actually present in the room.    I know that these messages are received, for again and again I have heard spirit return thanks for this communion and give evidence that he has received it by repeating to the medium some of the ideas expressed.

Spirit life is not a state of vagueness or eternal sleep, but one of activity and labour. Idleness and unemployment do not exist there.    There is plenty for all to do, although I know it is difficult for us who are immersed in material affairs to appreciate the activities of the spiritual world.

Apart from labour, there is the opportunity for recreation and enjoyment.   There are means of education and instruction in all branches of life – in just that particular form of knowledge which the spirit desires.

Of course, many of them are engaged in tasks which mean co-operation with people in this world.    Some of them are hard at work helping to make communication between the two worlds easier.

Others, attracted by people in our world who are following similar lines of research, industry, art or reform, naturally return to inspire those efforts, although often people in this world are unconscious of spirit interest.

(from “They Shall Be Comforted” by Maurice Barbanell,

published by the Psychic Book Club, London. Not dated.)

8 Suggestions for Therapists working with bereaved parents

©DAVE ROBERTS
My niece at a Hospice Butterfly Release (2013)

Working with a parent whose child has died can present unique challenges for a therapist on two levels:

 

1) A therapist who is also a mother or father finds themselves confronted with a parent’s worst nightmare. Unless acknowledged in clinical supervision, he/she may have difficulty being objective when working with surviving parents and family members.

 

2) The discovery that short-term or solution focused therapies falls short in addressing the ongoing challenges faced by parents after the death of their children.

 

I am a Licensed Master Social Worker, a retired addiction professional and a parent who has experienced the death of a child. My daughter Jeannine died on March 1, 2003, at the age of 18, due to a rare and aggressive form of cancer.

The re-examination of my personal priorities and values following Jeannine’s death, extended to the therapeutic approaches that I used with chemically dependent individuals. Prior to Jeannine’s death, I typically employed the stage theory of grief with substance users who experienced loss due to death. Stage theory was all that I knew.

 

My own experience after catastrophic loss taught me that grief didn’t progress in a series of linear, predictable stages. If grief wasn’t linear for me, then I couldn’t expect it to be for my clients.

 

Based on what I have discovered about myself today, I want to share 8 suggestions for therapists working with bereaved parents. I also believe that what follows applies to all individuals who have experienced loss due to death:

  • Focus on being a companion on the journey: It is important for therapists to bear witness to a parent’s path after the death of their child. Stories of relationships with their children need to be honoured. Through storytelling, therapists get to know the deceased child through the eyes of the parent.
  • Be prepared to witness parents’ experiences with after-death communication:  Many parents that I have companioned, routinely share instances where they have sensed the presence of their children. Since Jeannine’s death, I have received many signs of her presence. It is important for therapists to ask parents what thoughts they experienced prior to receiving the communication. The signs that parents receive from their children are usually a result of what transpires in the present. Some therapists may be sceptical of the existence of after death communication. Regardless of beliefs, it is important to reserve judgment and listen. I was one of those sceptics ……until my daughter died. Two very good books on this topic are: Hello From Heaven by Bill and Judy Guggenheim and Visions of the Bereaved by Kay Witmer Woods.
  • Recognise each parent’s right to grieve as he/she sees fit: Each parent’s expression of pain is unique. Empower parents to grieve in a way that is meaningful for them and effectively facilitates mourning after their children die. Any healthy expression of grief should be honoured
  • Emphasise the importance of ongoing support: Usually support groups composed of individuals who have experienced a similar type of loss (i.e. child, spouse) are the most effective. In my experience, effective therapy plus meaningful peer support is a powerful combination to help bereaved parents work through their grief.
  • Being aware of language: Avoid the use of the terms “closure “and “moving on” in therapy. Bereaved parents learn to navigate grief by maintaining ongoing bonds with their loved ones. It is through remembering and honouring the existence of their children, for as long as they live, that facilitates meaningful lives after loss.
  • Recognise that the sadness of loss is not the same as clinical depression: With grief work and ongoing support, sadness lessens and become more manageable over time. Many grieving individuals with whom I have worked, didn’t have a history of mental health challenges. Medicating grief for these individuals may delay the work that is needed to effectively negotiate it. However, if a therapist is working with bereaved parents with pre-existing emotional health or substance use issues, continued management of mental health symptoms and/or maintenance of sobriety for grief work to be effective, needs to be emphasised.
  • Helping bereaved parents recognise that they are much more: For purposes of clarity, I have used the term bereaved parents throughout this piece. It is crucial that therapists help parents discover that their identities extend beyond being bereaved. With the help of others and my desire to see the experience of loss differently, I began acknowledging my other skills as a parent to my two surviving children and as a teacher, friend and husband. Don’t allow parents to buy into the illusion that being bereaved is the totality of their identity.
  • Emphasise self-care: Though I have discovered that bereavement support is extremely fulfilling, continually attending to the energy of parents who have experienced the death of a child, can be extremely draining. It is crucial for therapists to routinely empower parents to do what nourishes their souls, in the aftermath of the death of their children. As a therapist empowers bereaved parents to fulfil their needs, he/she must be mindful of doing the same with respect to his/her needs.

 

Dave Roberts, Contributor Huffington Post, Adjunct Professor of Psychology-Utica College, Writer and speaker with specialities in grief and loss, spirituality and addiction.  

Thank you from IDigitalMedium

Thank You ~ A Sincere Word of Appreciation…

For the people who contributed so that iDigitalMedium can have the funds to incorporate as a non-profit – we say thank you.

I personally guarantee that your trust in us was not misplaced, as we will show in the remainder of this year and beyond. We’re working stiffs – just like you, and we are proud to partner up with you for the greatest challenge of our age.

A total of $875 was raised from all sources (online and offline). The reason the fundraiser shows a goal of $380 is because a few donors had given prior to the creation of the GoFundMe.

This fundraiser was a success – thanks to YOU! Did you know the cost of just filing with the IRS alone as a non-profit is $400? And when GoFundMe takes their 8% fee we’ll likely have just enough to get started out on the right foot with the rest of the official filings.

And for that, we thank you. Stay tuned as we revamp the website to be exactly what you – “The People” have you demonstrated you want it to be:

A place that will make it EASY to find information regarding life after death, a team that will SEEK this information out, as well as SAVE it for our children and our children’s children.

Sincerely,
Keith, and The iDigitalMedium Team

Bringing the spirit world into the open

I have found a fantastic site that is doing an incredible job in bringing spirit into the open and making information freely available for all.  The mission of this organisation is to:  Advance Knowledge of Life After Death, Research & Development of Communication with Spirit, Preserve History, Provide Inspiration, Promote Teamwork, and Build a Network.   The organisation is IDigitalMedium and can be found on this link: https://idigitalmedium.com/

As a grieving mother, I have spent thousands of dollars attempting to get “messages” from my daughter, and there was more than one person happy to relieve me of my money especially those early dark days of mad grief.  At IDigitalMedium there is just so much information for free I just had to share, and I wished I had known about earlier.  One page that I am like a kid in the lolly shop is the books page.   Amazing people have put up books that are helpful, many have led to books that are free, so many aspects of spirit life I still have not got to the bottom of the first list.  Here is a link to that page:  https://idigitalmedium.com/books/

However the next close second oh okay, sometimes I go here first is the page of websites. On this page is a list of websites all with some link to the spirit in some way.   Some are historical, some are about research happening now, some help us to help ourselves to begin our communication with our children, research from yesterday.  Honestly a plethora of information I cannot begin to tell you how much there is.  The link to that page is here:  https://idigitalmedium.com/websites/

IDigitalMedium has a project happening at the moment that I will tell you about.  They are coordinating a global thank you effort for Mr Bacci.  I first heard of and watched Mr Bacci when I began looking at how to communicate with spirit.  Mr Bacci is now an elderly man and no longer is working due to ill health, but for decades and decades from a humble, simple room filled with grieving people he would tweak his old valve radio and bring through the voices of spirit.  In all that time he did not charge.  He has been studied, watched by researchers and cynics,  and no one can claim any issue with what he does.  He is truly a pioneer.  How many times do you mean to say thanks to someone but put it off and say oh I will do it next time I see her, or want to say something but that time never comes.  This is an opportunity to thank a man who has been selfless in his service to grieving people, and I was proud and privileged to be able to participate because he showed to me that it can be done.  Details of Mr Bacci and his work and some films can be found here: https://idigitalmedium.com/

Portraits from beyond: The Mediumship of the Bangs Sisters….N.Riley Heagerty

After reading N. Riley Heagerty’s book “The French Revelation” about Emily French I was quick to purchase his latest book Portraits from Beyond: The Mediumship of the Bangs Sisters.   I was not disappointed.  I thank White Crow Books for their excellent review  which is reproduced below.

the-bangs-sisters

Within the little known ‘Century of Wonders’ between 1848 and 1948 in America, the physical phenomena manifesting in the séance rooms of the great psychic mediums baffles description. Two of its most famous mediums and yet, most vilified by the conjurers and critics of that day, were the Bangs Sisters, May and Elizabeth, of Chicago.

In their presence, spirits of the departed would manifest and precipitate directly on to a blank canvas in front of the astonished witnesses and, equally wondrous, spirit writing would manifest directly on to blank sheets of paper or slates.

The present work, by author and researcher N. Riley Heagerty, explores through rare source material and eyewitness accounts by people of unimpeachable character, the seemingly “ miraculous ” phenomena that was produced. In a fair and balanced manner, the writer also takes a close look at the most heated and public charges of fraud brought against these Chicago wonder workers.

This in depth, complete work, the first of its kind, unravels the truth of the great psychic mystery of the Bangs Sisters.


About the author

N. Riley Heagerty, has been involved non-stop in research involving Spiritualism and Physical Mediumship since 1985.

He has, up to the present day, collected and read more than 600 books – mostly rare, on the subject, and has lectured extensively in England and America.  His first published book, The French Revelation, dealt exclusively with the Independent Voice mediumship of Mrs. Emily S. French, of Rochester, New York.

Mr. Heagerty, considered one of the leading authorities on American Physical Mediumship in the United States has said, “The research of Mediumship and Spirit Communication is just as exciting and enthralling to me in the present day as it was during the first days of my research. It is an ongoing adventure that will never cease.  The subject is vast, marvelous and contains, in this researchers opinion, the most important truths we could ever know.  The heyday of Spiritualism, what I have termed the ‘Century of Wonders,’ existed between 1848 & 1948. Mrs. French along with May and Elizabeth Bangs are just three of the many that demonstrated their wondrous gifts within this time period and I am honored to write about them. “


Sample chapter

FOREWORD

In the Christian Bible there are detailed accounts of communication with spirits by clairvoyance; seeing spirits in their minds and then describing what they had seen. The medium is the connection between the living and the dead.

Many methods were used to contact the spirit world. The most outstanding example was Moses receiving the Ten Commandments written by the fingers of God. This was a fine example of psychography or more commonly known as slate writing in spiritualist language. In the mid 19th century, spirits produced knocks or raps on walls, floors, tables and ceilings. This phenomenon was refined by the Fox Sisters, Kate and Maggie on March 31, 1848 when a system of two way communication was established from the spirit of Charles Rosna. This date is known as the advent of Modern Spiritualism. Later developments brought slate writing, automatic writing and artwork; all were a means of communicating with spirits.

The Bangs Sisters, Elizabeth and May, were two of the most well-known physical mediums of the later 19th century and early 20th centuries. The sister’s phenomena started when they were young girls quite unexpectedly when furniture would move and levitate and coal would appear in the room they were in from unseen forces. Later in their young lives they were caught up in the Spiritualist movement and began to experience and produce slate writing, automatic writing and art work—precipitated portraits that would appear on a blank canvas of the deceased during a séance. The portraits first appeared as a drab black and white image then, with practice, and as their powers increased, appeared in brilliant colors. The Bangs Sisters traveled from their home town of Chicago, Illinois to Chesterfield Indiana, and Lily Dale, New York across the United States to every major city and into the European Continent. The Bangs Sisters have been remembered most for their Precipitated Spirit Painting mediumship.

N. Riley Heagerty; spiritualist, author, researcher and friend, has compiled research from all known and obsolete journals, newspapers, books and archives across the United States and Europe to arrange all the available information concerning the Bangs Sisters that has ever been placed in one book. This work has been a work of obsession and love for the Religion of Spiritualism and the complete and fair evaluation of the Bangs Sisters. This book, the following pages, should be considered the definitive research book concerning the Bangs Sisters and related Spiritualist phenomena.

Ron Nagy, Historian,
Lily Dale, NY

INTRODUCTION
Whatever the humblest men affirm from their own experience is always worth listening to, but what even the cleverest of men, in their ignorance deny, is never worth a moment’s attention. ~ Sir William Barrett

It is an honor to have written this book concerning the Bangs Sisters and their phenomena. They have been a part of my life for many a year. My first published work about them was a lengthy serialized article within the British publication of the late Noah’s Ark Society, The Newsletter, which ran in consecutive instalments from January to November, 1997, and also later on in 2006, a lengthy article I did on the Bangs was published by The Zerdin Buzzsheet, the premier publication concerning physical mediumship, also in England. On the complete cover of two of the issues of the Newsletter and the one Buzzsheet, which was 8 x 12, were color photos of spirit precipitated portraits by the Bangs Sisters. I was truly honored. I have lectured in both America and England on the Bangs phenomena and the reaction from the audience is always the same: complete wonder and astonishment at the phenomena itself, then an amazed confusion at how they could not have known about these seemingly miraculous events before and, of course, the automatic response from some that it must be fraud because it is far too incredible to be true; simply too much for them to comprehend.

Historic American Spiritualism, the heyday of which this researcher would place between 1848 and 1948, does not reside within the mainstream of contemporary thought but, if we were living in Chicago or, better yet, the famous Spiritualist towns of Camp Chesterfield, Indiana, or Lily Dale, New York, in the year say, 1909, we most certainly would have heard of the famous Bangs Sisters but alas, we are not. An in-depth look at the lives and phenomena of these two mediums was necessary. This is, in my opinion, the only way that a fair, intelligent and reasoned balance can be attained in understanding the authentic records of Modern Spiritualism and Mediumship. Just peeking below the surface with these matters is not enough. One must dive deep to find the pearls.

My first book, The French Revelation, was a rescue operation, saving from a certain march into obscurity and oblivion the séance records contained within the rare, out of print books and unpublished material of Edward C. Randall and his work with one of the greatest American independent voice mediums,  Emily S. French. That work was published as a complete edition. Mrs. French’s mediumship was without controversy, with the exception of a report filed by Dr. Isaac K. Funk   (1839-1912), and this was, in turn, recanted by himself when he, predeceasing Mrs. French by one year, manifested of all things, at one of her last séances, speaking in his own voice. The Bangs Sisters story, which is also a complete work, is more complicated and their phenomena of independent writing and most notably, their precipitated spirit portraits, were prone to attacks, some from individuals with names of distinction, such as Hereward Carrington (1880-1958)  the British psychic investigator and author, and David P. Abbott (1863-1934) the amateur magician, inventor and author.  One need only read the well-researched but amplified-article by Teller and Todd Karr: “ David P. Abbott and the Notorious Bangs Sisters” to understand how the press of the day, around 1905-1909, mainly the Chicago Daily Tribune and the Washington Post,  were openly hostile towards these mediums. Within my own research, I have found that the highly evidential reports of the Bangs phenomena, when looked at closely and balanced within the court of common sense, by far and away, outweigh the negative, jaundiced reports. The reports of fraud, were somewhat boisterous and rabid, but few—pale in comparison with eyewitness reports of individuals of unimpeachable character that crush those negative theories and accusations,  no matter how aggressive or intellectually elaborate they were, into dust. Scandalous character assassinations, just as much now as then, generate more headlines. David P. Abbott, early on, referred to the Bangs precipitated spirit portraits as: “The most remarkable mediumistic performance ever given to the world,” but naturally assumed, like most of the conjuring fraternity, of which he was an amateur, that if any form of physical phenomena manifesting in a séance could be duplicated by magic, then it conclusively proved fraud on the part of the mediums. These belligerent, crass assumptions, stated publicly—and which did, I am sure, unmask fraudulent mediums in certain cases, and all the better for it—were the standard mode of operation for the critics of the day. Like a terrorist who throws a rock, then runs like a coward, we have examples such as Mr. Abbott who wrote: The Spirit Portrait Mystery: Its Final Solution, but, did Mr. Abbott actually sit in the presence of the Bangs Sisters for a precipitated spirit portrait and actually witness what he said and what he based his theories on? We shall see. This has been examined in total within this work along with another “sensational expose” published in 1901   by an English investigator of psychic phenomena, Reverend Stanley L. Krebs, entitled: A Description of Some Trick Methods Used by Miss Bangs of Chicago. Also, the necessary reports of Hereward Carrington, mentioned above, have been included.

The book is illustrated, with numerous photographs of Bangs precipitated spirit portraits I have located, and many black and white photos of others from rare books. Many portraits and photos, knew what he witnessed with Mrs. French was highly evidential and genuine, but left loop holes in his findings. He stated at that séance (speaking from the spirit world) with Mrs. French after being told by Edward Randall that he had failed at the crucial moment to publish the truth which could have helped humanity: “I realize that now more than ever. It is a fact that I was afraid of the criticism of men of science. I now regret very much that I did not fully publish my conclusions. In my own mind there was no doubt.” unfortunately, had no written history with them to give us an idea of when or where they were precipitated, and for whom. There were, over the course of the Bangs career, hundreds and hundreds, better yet, thousands of precipitated portraits done. Many have been lost to the ages, or could be sitting in attics or basements, collecting dust and, I am sure, many have been unknowingly and sadly, consigned to the trash heap. In one astounding instance, which took place in January 1910, the Bangs Sisters had put on an exhibition in Kansas City of over one hundred precipitated spirit portraits and allegorical scenes of the spirit world. Dr. C. H. Carson, who arranged the announcement, said: “Nothing before seen can compare with the marvelous beauty of these psychic pictures and creations from an unseen world.” (See Chap.3) I am looking out the window as I write this, shaking my head in wonderment at where those portraits could be and trying to imagine what it must have been like to witness: the easels, a hundred of them situated throughout the hall; the colors of the event, and the turn of the century vernacular and dress. I have traveled far and have corresponded with experts to obtain photos, including England, California, Wisconsin, Indiana and New York. My friend, Ron Nagy, the historian and researcher at Lily Dale, New York, knows and understands the great mystery surrounding the whereabouts of Bangs portraits. His important work is discussed in the Appendices and is quoted at certain times throughout this book. As far as this work, I had to conclude my search so I could get the book published otherwise I could probably have spent the rest of my life searching for these elusive gems. For someone like myself who never likes to give up, this was tough, but necessary. Coincidentally, a beautiful Bangs Sisters spirit precipitated portrait turned up from Pennsylvania, while I was putting this book together. It was of James A. Stone and I am honored to include a photo of it. I would also like to say that I encourage everyone who reads this work to take the time to go and see for yourself the Bangs portraits at Lily Dale and at the Hett Memorial Art Museum at Camp Chesterfield. Knowing something of the history of them makes seeing them all the more incredible and you will know exactly what I mean when you see them up close.

I am compelled to do research on the great, early mediums because I feel that the modern world, thanks to outdated religious concepts and scientific bias, has been kept woefully unaware of phenomenal events that have happened within the great century between 1848 and 1948 which, in thousands of reported instances through mediumship, positively prove life after death and spirit communication. My so-called mission statement (if there ever was one) of why I do this research was instigated in many respects by the following facts. In certain instances involving reports of the Near Death Experience (NDE), the individual who has temporarily died and has gone to the world of spirits is met by a guide who, after hearing the plea by the person to continue in their new life in spirit rather than go back to the earth again, simply states to the individual, “Now that we have talked about your ongoing need to keep going here in this wondrous new life, tell me…” the guide now asks, “What have you done for mankind?” Many individuals do not know how to answer that simple but profound question and then decide that the only reasonable thing they can do is go back to earth and exact some kind of change, on whatever level, that aids to the moral or physical uplifting of humanity. This affected how I saw doing this research work and publishing the results. It is something, to me, that just might help humanity, however great or small, and possibly raise its spiritual consciousness. The world should be allowed to have access to the past records of what took place with so many of the great pioneer mediums. It is part of history and should not be consigned to the dark hole of obscurity. Truth always finds its way and, in this case, I don’t mind helping it do so.

By compiling this material, and editing it into one all-inclusive edition (everything available that I could find), it will make accessible to the reader an abundance of rare spirit precipitated portraits, all of which are more than 110-120 years old, and authentic eye-witness accounts and reports of one of the most stupendous events that has ever manifested within the records of Historic American Spiritualism: the phenomenal Bangs Sisters. What was once hidden in obscurity can now live again. The night brings forth the stars.


Publisher: White Crow Books
Published September 2016
238 pages
Size: 229 x 150 mm
ISBN 978-1-910121-65-8

 

Roberta Grimes books…

Roberta Grimes is a lady who has spent decades studying the afterlife and the massive amount of evidence that we now have for the continuation of life after death which has been at our disposal over the past 200 years.   She shares what she has learnt in two of her books which I have recently read.

The books are the Fun of Dying (2010) and the Fun of Staying in Touch (2014).  These two books form part of a trilogy that Roberta has written that explains in simple easy to understand fun-of-dyingterminology just what happens when we transition and about God, reality, and the meaning and purpose of life on earth.

 

 

 

 

In the Fun of Staying in Touch, she outlines the many ways that one can communicate with those who have transitioned and it also includes a study guide and a very comprehensive list of resources.

 

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Roberta is a business attorney who has written quite a few books including a book called Liberating Jesus.

Her books are easy to read.  If you have ever wondered what happens after death and how you may live today with your eternal life in mind, these are two great introductory books.

The following is taken from her blog, “Roberta has been a guest on hundreds of radio programs. She hosts her own live show called Seek Reality on the BBM Global Network, and podcasts of previous Seek Reality shows dating back to 2013 are available for free on WebTalkRadio.net and on iTunes, where her archive has had hundreds of thousands of downloads. Roberta’s shows and podcasts feature interesting and sometimes controversial topics and guests. Their purpose is to help you develop an understanding of what actually is going on.”

Her blog is at http://robertagrimes.com

Most of us believe there is something more to our four score years and ten. But what?  If you have ever wondered, what is next, then you may find yourself on an exciting journey with Roberta.

If you wish to find out a little more without resorting to the academic treatises, then check this lady’s books out.   I purchased my copies from The Book Depository as I have no local bookstore, but I am sure they would be readily available at your local bookstore or library.